~ NILIF, or Nothing in Life is Free ~
Nothing In Life Is Free, or NILIF, is not a specific training method, but is an approach to establishing leadership with your dog, or dogs, in a simple and straightforward way that does not require harshness or force. NILIF is often recommended for dogs that are pushy and for dogs with aggressive tendencies[1], but is also very useful if your dog is shy, timid, easily bored and needs a job, easily distractable, or even if you'd simply like your dog to pay you more attention. NILIF does not by itself correct particular training issues, but provides a foundational working relationship between you and your dog that will make other training much easier. You and your dog both will both benefit from the stronger bond that comes when your dog has full trust in your leadership.
The idea behind Nothing In Life Is Free is that your dog has to earn the good things that you provide. As leader of the pack, you are the provider. YOU control access to things like food and the best spots to sleep. As the leader, YOU control when it's time to walk and when it's time to rest.
The following things all have value to dogs: dinner bowl, sitting on the couch, sleeping in bed with humans, going for a walk, treats or table scraps, playing fetch or tug, sniffing a favorite post. This is not a comprehensive list, and the definition of "good stuff" will vary greatly from dog to dog and household to household. Before your dog may have any of these good things, he must do something for you. An example of this might to be ask your dog to sit before you give him his dinner. You may also think of this as asking your dog to "Say Please". Just as (I hope!) one might teach a child to say please and thank you when you pass them a dish at the table, you should EXPECT your dog to refrain from bowling you over at dinner time.
The following are some examples of common priviledges and behaviors you might ask for. These are all samples and should be adapted to what is desirable polite behavior for your household. You should also expect a great deal more from a very pushy dog than from a polite, mellow dog. For a very timid dog, you might choose to ask for lots of behaviors but keep them very easy.
| Rude | Polite |
| Dinner time: Your dog leaps around your legs while you get dinner ready. You carry the food bowl up high to keep it out of reach while you go to the food location, and your dog starts digging in while you quickly set it down on the floor. | You ask your dog to lie down while you get dinner together or else you stop getting it ready. If your dog jumps up while you walk to where he eats, you set the dinner on the counter and walk away for 15 seconds. You ask him to sit before you start putting the bowl down. Your dog waits until you say it's okay; if he starts early, you will NOT say "Ah ah ah" or "No", you will simply pick up the food bowl, set it out of reach, and walk away for 15 seconds before trying again. (You might start with just asking for a brief sit, then working up to a longer sit and a Wait. At the beginning, ask for what your dog is capable of and stretch it out over time). |
| Time for a walk: Your dog dances around excitedly while you wrestle him to put on his collar. You make sure you have a good grip on the leash before you open the front door, and brace backward as he pulls you out the door. | You sit or stand in one place and wait for your dog to come to you and hold still to have his collar put on. There's no walk without a collar and no collar without coming to you and holding still. Before the front door opens, dog should be sitting. If doggie butt comes off the floor, the door shuts. By the time the door is fully open, doggie butt should be firmly on the floor until you say Okay or else the door shuts again. |
| Table Scraps: You like to share dinner with your dogs. You absently mindedly hand over or drop bits of food as you're eating. If your dog whines or paws at you, you are more likely to notice him and give him something. | Best: Save scraps until meal is over and put them in the dogs bowl. Fair: If you insist on feeding from the table or while eating, ask for a Sit, Down, or a behavior that you find polite before feeding. Under no circumstances feed if the dog is doing something you consider rude, like staring or pawing. Make a point to watch for behavior you want to reward, such as lying quietly. If you have even the slightest concerns about food aggression or resource guarding with your dog, please do not ever feed scraps while you are eating. |
| Sharing the Bed (or Couch): Dog hops up and make himself comfortable sideways across the bed (or couch). Humans crawl into bed, contorting themselves so as not to disturb the dog. | Dog is asked to move off the bed while human gets in, then is invited back up to get comfortable. Note: Some experts recommend against letting dogs sleep in bed at all because it may send mixed signals about status. I share the opinion of other experts who believe that most dogs can be invited to sleep in the bed with no problem, but that any dog with a history or risk of aggression should have this priviledge removed. This goes for aggression toward any person or animal in the household. In addition to sending a clear message about status, all sorts of things can happen during the night like thrashing, kicking, or strange noises that might provoke a reaction from your dog. Since you're asleep when this happens, you're in no position to manage or evaluate any reaction that your dog has. |
| Attention/Petting: Dog shoves self in under your arm, pushes up against you, jumps up, or paws at you to get your attention. You absentmindedly pet dog while continuing to read, watch television, or other activitiy. | You ignore dog, maybe physically turning away, while dog is being demanding. When you're ready, you call dog back over for petting or other attention. (Not all dogs are be pushy for attention. The point here is still that if there's something your dog wants, YOU control how and when it gets doled out.) |
| Playing with Toys: Dog shoves ball or tug toy at you. After insistent pushiness, you throw the ball or tug on the toy. | You initiate playtime when you're ready and not when the dog insists on it. If you decide to take the dog up on the play invitation, give a short break before you start playing, or ask for some behavior (Sit, Down, Roll Over, etc) before you begin playing. Better yet, keep some special toys like tugs put away until you're ready to play. |
| Picking Where to Walk: When going for a walk, you like to let the dog pick where to go. When dog picks, he drags you in the direction he wants to go or he stands stubbornly facing the direction he wants to go until you give in. | You like to let the dog pick where to go, but you expect him to "ask" instead of "tell" where to go. Your dog may look in the direction he wants to go, but he knows that if he pulls or is stubborn, you will go the opposite direction. |
| Sniffing a Favorite Post: Your dog has a favorite spot he likes to sniff on his walks. He drags you excitedly over. | Sniffing something good can be a Good Stuff or reward too! For every step that your dog drags you forward, take three more steps back. Then ask for a sit with eye contact or another calm, attentive behavior before releasing dog to "Go Sniff!". |
It's very important that you be un-emotional about asking for behaviors. If you don't get what you've asked for, don't get excitable or upset if you don't get what you're asking for. Don't tell the dog he is wrong, avoid repeating the command and avoid touching or luring your dog into doing the behavior. If the dog doesn't do what you ask, he simply doesn't get the Good Stuff you're withholding. Make sure to start with behaviors that are very easy for your dog, since the idea is to ask for a simple, polite behavior and not to have an extended training session. If your dog continues to get distracted, the value of the Good Stuff may not be worth enough for the behavior you're asking for. That's okay... just make sure that he does not have the Good Stuff without doing something you've asked for, however small. If the dog wants supper / to go out the front door / to get on the couch he will do what you've asked. If he doesn't do what you've asked, he doesn't get that priviledge. It is critical that you BE CONSISTENT, so at the beginning, you may need to take a little extra time to wait for compliance while your dog gets the new game. This is another good reason not to ask for anything very difficult when you're starting out.
Households with Multiple Dogs
NILIF can be especially important in multi-dog households. Nothing In Life Is Free can cut down on or prevent competition between dogs in the household by establishing that the dogs of the household are low enough on the totem pole that there is no need to scrabble over resources like food, sleep spaces, or toys. More importantly, they should not be scuffling over attention from the humans of the household. "Attention from Mom or Dad" is Good Stuff for many dogs. While one dog is getting attention, the other dog will often shove in or try to pressure the first dog away from "Mom" or "Dad". If Dog #2 is successful, then Dog #2, not you, was the one in control of the interaction and the Good Stuff.
Instead, YOU stop Dog #2 from being pushy until YOU have finished with Dog #1 and YOU have decided to grant attention to Dog #2. Especially with larger dogs, it is important for human safety that dogs learn to yield to the human when there is a three-way interaction; shoving and accidental bites can happen when dogs are focused on each other with no regard to the human in their presence. (In my house, dogs are given a little bit of lattitude to work things out with each other, but never, ever within arm's reach of a human, when a human is approaching, and especially not near doorways, stairways or hallways.)
Using NILIF for Training
One more advantage of NILIF is that it allows you countless opportunities every single day to train your dog, 10 seconds at a time. When you control access to the Good Stuff, you can use it to practice Sit, Down, Give Paw, Speak, Roll Over or anything else your dog may know. In our house, we use it to tune up formal obedience at mealtimes. At the time of this writing, I ask each dog for a one nice Front (sit straight, directly in front of me) before I put down the food bowl. One dog is more advanced and expected to have a perfectly straight sit before I put the food down, and the other is not as advanced and gets the food just for sitting in the general right place. My dogs are not allowed to start eating until I tell them Okay, so other times I might put the food bowls down and make them wait 10, 20, or 30 seconds until I say Okay and release them to eat. Many people believe that you need to set aside a big chunks of time to dedicate to training, but in truth, dogs learn incredibly well when you do a couple tiny sessions a day. Since your dog has to eat anyway, it's an incredible waste not to spend an extra few seconds to add to his training while you're feeding.
In Conclusion
When following the NILIF approach, your dog will be happier because he will understand what is expected of him. He will also be happier for having a job and mental exercise. You will be happier because your dog is happier, and because he will be more reponsive and attentive. In my experience, dogs are usually the most loving with the leader of the pack, not the one who spoils them. Providing strong, fair leadership for your dog is the best way to increase your bond and build a strong, lasting relationship.
[1] Information presented here is not a substitute for professional advice; please see a professional trainer for assistance with aggression issues.
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Author: Erica Pytlovany
Created On: April 10, 2006
Last Modified: May 8, 2006
Feedback/comments welcome at: training AT blackacorndogs DOT com (remove spaces and substitute AT and DOT with '@' and '.')
